Let's Talk About It
How to Talk About HIV
It Takes MOJO to Have the Conversation
I’m seeing a new guy and he wants to take it up to the next level…sex. I like him a lot, and really want to, but I feel like we should talk about HIV before we get intimate. Then I think … wow, if I ask him questions like that, he may not want me anymore. I don’t want to lose him.
It’s good that you didn’t have sex before you asked, because it is really important to have the conversation beforehand. Wait for the right time, when you’re both calm and relaxed. Tell him how important it is to you to know if he has been tested. Ask him if he has been tested, and tell him about your status.
I know my girlfriend has a past, and I know who it was. I’ve heard rumors her ex was, you know, maybe with guys from time to time. I worry about it. I think I should ask her about HIV. I don’t know if she always used a condom.
Who knows, she may have questions about your past, too! Here’s an idea…why not go and get tested together?
Hey, when I asked my partner about her status, she looked at me like I was crazy! She said, “What’s your problem? I feel fine! Don’t you trust me?”
Tell her this isn’t about trust. It’s about knowing what’s what. A lot of people carry HIV and don’t even know it!
My partner can be such a baby sometimes! He says he doesn’t want to know his HIV status because he doesn’t want to know if he’s going to die. I think it’s also because he does not like needles and is scared about the blood test. But he would never admit it! HIV rapid tests are simple. Nowadays they can swab your mouth. You don’t necessarily have to have a blood test. So fear of needles is no excuse!
With HIV, the sooner you know, the better. If you’re negative, you can keep it that way. And it you’re positive, hey, it’s NOT a death sentence! A lot of people live long lives with HIV nowadays with the medications. You can get medicines at low or no cost if they need it.
My boyfriend said he doesn’t need to be tested … again. He got tested a while ago, and it was okay.
It can take weeks, or even months, for HIV to show up in the body. It’s a good idea to get tested regularly to make sure you’re not infected.
Talk about it.
Get tested together.
It’s about love, respect and caring for each other.